If I Were Running for President …

I’d make the following speech:

It’s a rare privilege for me to stand here today as a candidate to serve you in the people’s house. And as a candidate, I have a solemn responsibility to you to do the right thing … to work for you … to protect your interests … and to make America America again.

Let me ask you a crucial question. When you look at Washington, what do you see?

Do you see a dysfunctional district detached from the laws and responsibilities that Americans live with day to day?

Where bureaucrats find it all too easy to waste your tax dollars?

Where millions upon millions of citizen dollars are misspent and unaccounted for?

Where hundreds of thousands of stimulus dollars are allegedly creating a handful of low-paying jobs … in non-existent congressional districts?

Do you see a city where ethics, morality and integrity are sorely lacking? And corruption is rampant?

Are you as fed up with Washington as I am?

I thought so.

If elected, I will …

  • Starve funding for ObamaCare until it is repealed.
  • Return the $716 billion to Medicare this president plans to use toward ObamaCare. I’ll stop Medicare fraud immediately, I won’t wait until 2014 as this president says he’ll do!
  • I’ll fire the 16,500 IRS agents hired to harass you into compliance with ObamaCare.
  • Pull the plug on IPAB and give death panels a quick burial.
  • Demand accountability from federal agencies and employees across the board. Those employees who don’t comply will not last long. The federal government work place will not be scheduling any more trips to Las Vegas to party on your dime.  Pornography in the government work place will not be tolerated.
  • Report to you monthly on government waste and steps I’ve taken personally to stop it.
  • Rebuild the U.S. military … to give them the resources they need to protect you … and defend liberty.
  • Promote America’s exceptionalism and virtues … and advocate for freedom around the world.
  • Incentivize all legitimate sources of domestic energy.
  • Fill my administration with hard-working, respectable Americans who have paid their taxes and continue to pay their taxes.
  • Give you an honest day’s work every day. And demand the same from everyone working for the federal government, from custodians to agency heads.
  • Make sure all key decision makers in Washington are accountable to oversight.
  • Defend marriage from all legal attacks – including the Defense of Marriage Act.
  • Stop funding overseas abortions.
  • Protect your religious freedom. And protect the religious freedom of chaplains serving our men and women in the military.
  • Protect our borders from those who refuse to apply properly for immigration.
  • Applaud all who invest in business to create jobs for Americans so they can provide for their families.
  • Surround myself – and fill my cabinet — with Americans who are representative of Main Street.
  • Establish a tax rate that is fair to all Americans.
  • Limit the excessive regulations and taxation driving American industry overseas.
  • I will work with educators across the nation to ensure that children can read and excel in all subject areas. To be competitive in the world, I will demand improvement as a nation in math and sciences. I will hold the Department of Education accountable for measureable improvement each year. I will be a hands-on president in education.
  • I will demand a balanced federal budget each and every year. As long as we have a national deficit, there will have to be cuts across the board until we get our house in order. Just as you do with your personal finances. Government will be held accountable in its spending from Day One of my administration. I will be a hands-on president in federal finance.
  • We  must turn around the housing crisis in America. I will be a hands-on president as long as we have this crisis hanging over our heads.
  • I will promote free enterprise capitalism at home and abroad. I will return Government Motors to private ownership.
  • I’ll be marching for life in Washington every January. We must make abortion unthinkable and comfort those in crisis pregnancies with positive options, such as adoption. Killing over a      million defenseless American boys and girls each year is a tragedy beyond measure. Abortion is not the avenue to national prosperity or the blessings of our Creator.
  • Repair and uphold America’s friendship with Israel. Jerusalem IS the capital of Israel.
  • Decrease funding for the United Nations.
  • On my sworn oath, I will uphold the Constitution of the United States of America.

If elected, I will not …

  • Apologize for the murderous actions of terrorists and mob violence.  I’m less concerned about their feelings than I am about American lives.
  • I will not allow drug smugglers to enter the country through our borders.
  • Play one hour of golf while 23 million Americans are unable to feed and insure their families.
  • Raise taxes.
  • Use your tax dollars to haul a clunker out of someone’s garage.
  • Use your tax dollars to give golf carts away.
  • Negotiate with, or fund terrorists.
  • Give your tax dollars to foreign nations for oil exploration.
  • Throw away your tax dollars on companies going out of business.
  • Stockpile my administration with unaccountable czars.
  • Use the government to harass political opponents.
  • Give your money to Planned Parenthood or any other organization committing abortions.
  • Neither I nor my family will take more than 3 weeks of vacation time in a year.  The office of the presidency should not be used as a free ticket to unlimited luxury vacations.
  • I will not demonize achievers and those who take risks and invest in business to create jobs for Americans. I will not engage in class warfare.
  • I will not pressure lenders to make risky loans.
  • I will have no part of socialism. It is a consistent loser.
  • I will not bail out any failing business. Because you cannot afford it.
  • I will not harm the economy by issuing crippling fines or forcing companies to close down because they won’t fund abortion. The president’s abortion pill mandate is deplorable.
  • I will not support the radical policies and movements at the United Nations.
  • And finally, I will not allow the federal government to get in the way of Americans honestly trying to go about their lives and business.

Please join with me to make America America again! God bless you, and God bless America!

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2 thoughts on “If I Were Running for President …

  1. Federal employees work about a month less per year than private sector workers, according to a report by conservative think tank Heritage Foundation.

    The report found federal employees work on average of 38.7 hours a week, compared with 41.4 hours per week in the private sector. That difference adds up to 3.8 fewer weeks per year that feds work compared with private sector workers.

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