Dems Assail Trump’s NFL Comments

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News

JohnPresident Trump’s objection to NFL players refusing to stand for the playing of the National Anthem prior to the start of their football games spurred outrage among assorted Democrats.

Democratic Coalition chairman Jon Cooper maintained that Trump’s statement that “the sons of bitches who won’t stand for the Anthem ought to be fired” violates federal law. “It’s pretty clear that the president saying someone ought to be fired is a crime,” Cooper said. “This crime carries a penalty of 15 years in prison.”

Despite the lack of any mention of race in Trump’s remarks, Rep. Maxine Waters (D-Calif) insisted that his statement was “racist. We all know that the NFL is a plantation where black men are forced to risk grievous bodily harm to entertain and enrich white folks. Calling the players who protested their enslavement ‘sons of bitches’ is a ‘dog whistle’ telling their white overseers to fire them. This is the clearest evidence yet that Mr. Trump is unfit to rule and deserves to be impeached.” (Note: the minimum annual salary for “enslaved” NFL players is over $400,000. Many stars earn far more. Detroit Lions Quarterback Matthew Stafford, for example, has a five-year $135 million contract.)

Former presidential candidate Hillary Clinton echoed Waters’ take on the issue and wondered whether Trump “might be sending a coded message to his rich team-owning friends to have a few players killed as an example to others not to challenge his power. That would be a very persuasive message and likely to silence most opposition.”

Left-wing columnist Jonathan Alter cleverly characterized Trump’s words as “the fumble that will end his presidency. Football players are the most revered heroes of our culture. By pissing them off, Trump has ensured they will unite against him. Given the choice between whether to stick with their gridiron favorites or Trump’s lame demand that respecting the anthem and the flag ought to rein-in their right to protest, I think we all know how that will turn out.” Alter hailed reports “that NFL viewership was only down 20 percent seals the deal. Eighty percent will follow the players and vote to oust Trump in 2018.”

In related news, the United Nations Human Rights Council demanded that Canada “apologize and pay reparations to blacks living in their country.” Though Canada never had slavery, and in fact, offered refuge to slaves escaping north from the United States, UN spokesman Adam Blackman pointed out that “the power structure in Canada is white. It’s always been white. What more proof do we need that reparations are warranted?”

Operation “Safe City” Nets Nearly 500 Illegals

U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) teams made 498 arrests in “sanctuary cities” this past week as part of an enforcement action dubbed “safe city.” Those arrested included 317 people with criminal convictions, 68 immigration fugitives, 104 people who had previously been deported and 18 known gang members.

Philadelphia Mayor Jim Kenney (D) denounced the ICE raids as “an infringement on our city’s sovereignty. We gave our word to these undocumented immigrants that they would be safe from arrest in our jurisdiction. Now we look like fools.”

The Mayor vowed legal action “to reverse this egregious miscarriage of justice. We’re confident that we can find a judge who will rescind the ICE arrests and order the release of these victims of the Trump Administration’s racist xenophobia. And we’re not ruling out asking for punitive damages to discourage further atrocities of this sort.”

ICE acting Director Tom Homan called the Mayor’s declaration “a sick and twisted version of reality. Our action targeted the worst offenders. His efforts to shield these individuals from law enforcement endanger public safety. If anyone should be held liable it’s those sanctuary cities who give a haven to wanted criminals that prey upon the citizens government is obligated to protect.”

Governor Approves Medicaid for Abortions

This week, Illinois Gov. Bruce Rauner (R) signed legislation authorizing tax money to be used to fund abortions for poor people. This reversed a position he announced last April against such funding, but honors his 2014 campaign pledge “to ensure that poor mothers have the same ability to terminate unwanted children that their richer sisters have.”

Rauner brushed aside Republican arguments that individuals morally opposed to the murder of unborn children shouldn’t be forced to finance it through taxes, saying that “individual matters of conscience cannot be permitted to impede the collective will of the people. I was elected on a promise to extend abortion rights to those who can’t afford to pay for it. The Democratic legislators who passed the bill were elected on the promise to expand the scope of abortion. Democracy must prevail over idiosyncratic moral or religious prejudices.”

The Governor also argued that “in the long run increasing the frequency of abortions for the poor will work to the GOP’s political advantage. The children of poor people usually grow up to be Democratic voters. Be enabling interdiction before birth we will be decreasing the number of future Democratic voters. So, as I see it, Republicans who oppose public funding for abortion aren’t thinking strategically.”

In related news, Doug Jones, the Democratic nominee for Alabama’s US Senate seat, called the Illinois legislation “a good omen. The days when extremists like Roy Moore can prevent women from exterminating their unwanted offspring are surely numbered.” Jones is confident that his firm support of abortion “up until the day of birth” will be a winning issue over his GOP opponent Moore in this December’s special election.

China Cracks Down on Toilet Paper Abuses

Concerned that its citizens might be using too much toilet paper, the government of China is installing facial recognition technology in its public restrooms. If the same person tries to obtain more than his or her allotted four squares of toilet tissue per visit the computer will recognize the face and withhold any additional paper.

Chinese Minister of Public Facilities Hu Du Dung explained that “four squares is an adequate amount for any socially responsible person. It is four times the amount the Japanese allowed to their POWs during World War II. Any attempt to use more is theft from the collective.”

Dung adamantly rejected the possibility that digestive distress might warrant a larger allotment. “Unlike backward countries such as the United States, China has universal, single-payer health care,” he pointed out. “Those who suffer bowel irregularities have only themselves to blame. They have no right to appropriate more than their designated share of toilet tissue. Our new technology will ensure that this doesn’t happen.”

Meanwhile, in America’s cruel capitalistic society toilet paper is freely available in public restrooms across the country despite the lack of the high-tech methods now being deployed in the more advanced China.

In related news, an editorial in the New York Times lauded “the amazing strides communism achieved for Chinese women.” The editorial admitted that “while Chinese women have suffered under the ubiquitous oppression inflicted on all the country’s inhabitants, the suffering has been equal. Considering the traditional patriarchal Chinese culture that preceded communism we mustn’t discount that accomplishment.” The editorial failed to mention the country’s technological advance in toilet paper rationing.

Trump Tax Plan “Death Blow” to High-Tax States

A feature of the Trump Administration’s proposed tax reform plan that has stirred fear among governors of high-tax states is the elimination of deductions for state income and property taxes. New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo (D) called it a “death blow” for his state.
“New York has traditionally relied on high taxes to fund the services we provide for our population,” the Governor pointed out. “Resistance to these tax high rates has been moderated by the fact that deductions from federal taxes has helped pass some of the burden onto to states that have lower taxes. If we lose that deduction more New Yorkers will object to our state’s taxes.”

Cuomo complained that the Trump plan’s replacement of state tax deductions with larger standard deductions ($12,000 for single filers and $24,000 for joint filers) “is unfair to our residents. Right now, the average deduction for state taxes for Manhattan residents is nearly $25,000. Trump’s plan would allow the same standard deduction for filers living in all states. A perk that has been enjoyed by New Yorkers for decades would be dissipated into a universally shared equal benefit. How will people afford to live in New York if they’re to be treated the same as residents in other states?”

New York Republican Reps. Dan Donovan and Peter King joined Cuomo’s complaint asserting that “to treat New Yorkers like everyone else is unAmerican. Our state has grown accustomed to a special status. New York City would not be a world-class city without the tax-subsidy the current code allows. We will ally with Republicans from other high-tax states and Democrats to make sure Trump’s plan is killed.”

California is the biggest high-tax state. It currently receives a $100 billion subsidy per year under the current tax code. Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-Calif) called the subsidy “critical to sustaining my state’s status as the wealthiest in the United States. I cannot abide a tax reform that would change this even if it treats all states equally. California voters didn’t elect me to achieve fairness to other states. They expect me to defend our entitlements and that’s what I’m going to do.”

Feinstein also cited a recent report published by the Federation for American Immigration Reform (FAIR) showing that illegal immigration costs American taxpayers $135 billion per year as further inspiration for her opposition to Trump’s proposal. “As a sanctuary state, California has to bear a disproportionate share of this cost,” the Senator observed. “If we lose the federal deduction for state taxes our ability to continue as a haven for these immigrants would be threatened.”

Special Counsel Declines to Pursue Evidence of Obama Crimes

While Special Counsel Robert Mueller has yet to uncover any evidence of a Trump-Russia plot to steal last year’s presidential election, he has turned up disturbing incidents of the Obama Administration’s illegal spying on American citizens and lying under oath.
However, it is unlikely that anything will come of these findings since, as Mueller explains, “whatever misdeeds may or may not have been committed by members of the previous administration are not part of my mandate. My mission is to prove collusion between Trump’s people and agents of the Russian government. For me to go outside of my mission mandate would violate the explicit instructions I was given when acting Attorney General Rosenstein appointed me.”

A Satirical Look at Recent News
John Semmens is a retired economist who has written a weekly political satire for The Arizona Conservative since 2005. He says working on his satires is one of the ways he tries to honor the liberties our Founding Fathers tried to protect.

Please do us a favor. If you use material created by The Arizona Conservative, give us credit and DO NOT change the context. Thank you.

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Sweden Adopts Stern Response to Country’s Rape Epidemic

 By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News

JohnNow that the influx of Muslim refugees into the country has catapulted Sweden to the top of the international heap when it comes to the crime of rape, government officials have determined it is time to take action. That action is the publication of a “sex guidebook” intended to convey a message to immigrants from Muslim countries that rape is wrong.

Youth and Civil Affairs Authority Director General Lena Nyberg explained that “the issue seems to be one of culture shock for young Muslim males entering Swedish society. These refugees were raised in a culture that explicitly designates females as sex objects for Muslim men. Naturally, these young men have a hard time adjusting to the western concept of equal rights for women.”

“Even worse, their religious doctrine declares that women who show their faces in public are whores,” Nyberg continued. “Consequently, Swedish women who go out in public with their faces showing are considered legitimate targets for punitive rape, assault, and murder by devout Muslims. Hopefully, our guide book will clarify the situation and deter Muslim men from committing these crimes.”

In Rinkeby, a suburb of Stockholm, local Imam Iwan Akillya denounced the guidebook, calling it “a violation of our religious rights and duties. Unbelievers trying to force their degraded western values on the people of Islam is unacceptable. True believers must follow the Quran, not the satanic blather of Swedish bureaucrats. It is Allah’s command that the faithful have a duty to slay the unbelievers, though it does permit using them as temporary sex slaves before killing or converting them.”

Nyberg said “the Imam’s statement is unfortunate. We hope it doesn’t reflect the real feelings among the young immigrants we are trying to reach. Our assumption is that those coming to our country as refugees are interested in fitting in with a new culture. Otherwise, why would they have chosen to leave the country of their birth?”

Akillya pointed out “the key flaw in the government’s reasoning is that Sweden is their country. All the world is for Allah. The sooner the unbelievers recognize this and convert to Islam, the sooner they can begin to enjoy membership in the only legitimate religion and know the peace of being one with the umma.”

In related news, Germany’s threat to support a European Union penalty of $75 million on Poland for its refusal to take in more Muslim refugees brought a stinging reply from Poland’s foreign minister Witold Waszczykowski. “We have seen the crime and social disruption that the importation of these so-called refugees has done to other European nations,” he said. “Germany, of all countries, should be keenly aware of the havoc that unwanted invaders can do to a country. By our estimation, the uninvited German visitors of 1939 ended up causing close to a trillion dollars worth of damage to Poland. Before Germany goes on a campaign to intimidate us to accept more invaders perhaps they should consider paying for the damage their country inflicted on all the places their troops went without being asked during World War II.”

Dem PAC Files Ethics Complaint

The Democratic Coalition filed a complaint with the Office of Government Ethics alleging that Presidential Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders’ suggestion that ESPN host Jemele Hill’s tweet labeling the President “a white supremacist who has largely surrounded himself with other white supremacists” might be a “fireable offense,” broke the law.

Democratic Coalition chairman Jon Cooper insisted that “we cannot ignore the sinister implications of what the Trump Administration has done here. Mrs. Sanders contends she is entitled to express her opinion about the outrageous comments of Ms. Hill, but clearly her statement was intended to intimidate ESPN into firing one of its valued employees for merely expressing her opinion about Trump and his henchmen.”

Nate Lerner, the Democratic Coalition’s executive director, cast Sanders’ words as “another example of the Trump White House’s blatant disregard for the Constitution. A few months ago we had Kellyanne Conway urging people to buy Ivanka’s clothing line, now this. It is of the utmost importance that we hold the Trump administration accountable for its illicit behavior. If Sanders doesn’t go to jail over this it will be a dark day for our democratic institutions.” The law Lerner has in mind calls for a fine, up to 15 years in prison, or both.

Whether ESPN could conceivably be frightened into a firing action it disagrees with based on comments made by a Trump Administration official seems dubious. Anti-Trump commentary has become an annoying and intrusive part of the network’s sports broadcast coverage over the past year. The only employee ESPN has fired for expressing political views was former Major League Baseball pitcher Curt Schilling after he questioned the wisdom of laws forcing organizations to allow professed “transgendered” individuals to use whatever restroom or locker room they pleased despite their conflicting physical anatomy.

Weiner Pleads for Leniency

Former congressman Anthony Weiner (D-NY) asked a Manhattan federal court to grant him leniency after his conviction for sending obscene emails and texts to an under-aged 15-year-old girl last year. Prosecutors are seeking a sentence of 21 to 27 months for a charge that carries a maximum of 10 years in prison.

Weiner’s lawyers argued that “the girl was the instigator of the crime. She preyed upon the weaknesses of a man who was widely known as a sex pervert. Now she’s written a book and will profit from the experience. So, to say that she was an innocent victim is false.”

A second mitigating factor cited was “the fact is, Mr. Weiner’s wife has already suffered enough. Her political career has been crushed. She’s lost the confidence and affection of former Secretary of State, and the only person she truly loves, Hillary Clinton. Under the State of New York’s community property law, her suffering ought to be credited against her husband’s legal liability.”

A third mitigating factor cited was that “given the narrow margin of her loss, it could be argued that the untimely revelation of Mr. Weiner’s misdeeds tipped the scales against Mrs. Clinton in her run against Donald Trump for the presidency. Surely, the misery now being experienced by this dedicated public servant and her supporters is sufficient punishment without putting Mr. Weiner behind bars.”

Lastly, Weiner’s lawyers argued that “putting this man in jail will deprive his son of his father’s presence. The boy’s development would be stunted without the daily interaction and guidance his father would be able to provide if he is allowed to go free. Who will teach the boy how to be a man? Who will teach the boy the difference between right and wrong? For the sake of this young boy’s future he needs his father.”

Hillary Admits “Mistakes Made”

One of the more bizarre revelations in Hillary Clinton’s campaign autopsy book—What Happened—was her admission that she tried Voodoo, “but it didn’t work. I had dolls of all the key players—Trump, Bannon, Limbaugh. I stuck them with pins like you’re supposed to, but none of them even got sick, much less died.”

The former presidential candidate speculated that “some sort of Russian radiation or hypersonic interference may have short-circuited the effectiveness of this time-tested technique. I mean, it’s not like I haven’t successfully used this tool before. We made a lot of problems disappear when Bill was governor of Arkansas and when we were in the White House. So, there’s got to have been some outside interference that prevented it from clearing a path to my election last year. Putin and the Russians seem to be the logical answer.”

A more predictable Clinton reaction in the book was her castigation of the “mistakes made by every woman who didn’t vote for me. They had a chance to make history by electing the first person without a penis to the presidency, but they blew it.”

“I’ve been searching for the reasons,” Clinton said. “In some cases I think it was a case of spousal abuse intimidating women from acting independently and voting for me. In other cases I think domineering fathers discouraged their daughters from breaking free of the patriarchy. So fearsome were these baleful male influences that even the secret ballot could not overcome their fear of what would happen to them if the men in their lives suspected they had voted for me.”

Though Clinton feigned a vague implied sympathy for women frightened away from voting for her, she refused to offer any absolution. “I’m not letting anyone off the hook for the evil they’ve done by not voting for me,” Hillary declared. “It’s their sin and they should suffer their well-deserved anguish and sleepless nights for as long as they live—like the young woman whose mother made her publicly apologize to me for not voting for me. Perhaps the humiliation that woman experienced will inspire other mothers to exert more effective control over their daughters the next time a woman runs for president.”

In related bad news for Mrs. Clinton, a County Circuit Court in Maryland ordered the State Bar to open an investigation into the conduct of three lawyers who allegedly helped her illegally delete her emails. Judge Paul Harris ruled that “an accusation that lawyers who have a special obligation to obey the law actually broke the law merits more than a hasty dismissal.” Harris rejected arguments from the three lawyers—David Kendall, Cheryl Mills and Heather Samuelson—that the case was frivolous since a similar complaint had already been dismissed in Arkansas, saying that “we should aspire to higher standards of ethics than might prevail in Arkansas.”

Meanwhile, 1600 newly released Clinton emails from her term as Secretary of State provide fresh examples of a “pay to play” scheme wherein donors to the Clinton Foundation received special favors from the State Department. Not only do these emails indicate a pattern of self-dealing corruption, they also contradict her testimony that she turned over all her Department-related correspondence before erasing only her personal correspondence upon leaving the office in 2013. A Clinton spokesperson, in a not-for-attribution statement, denied that the former Secretary of State’s testimony constituted perjury “because she was never asked to testify under oath. So whatever lies she may have told are, technically, not perjury.”

A Satirical Look at Recent News
John Semmens is a retired economist who has written a weekly political satire for The Arizona Conservative since 2005. He says working on his satires is one of the ways he tries to honor the liberties our Founding Fathers tried to protect.

Please do us a favor. If you use material created by The Arizona Conservative, give us credit and DO NOT change the context. Thank you.

Menendez Trial Raises Thorny Issues

By John Semmens — Semi-News — A Satirical Look at Recent News

JohnSen. Robert Menendez (D-NJ) and his “campaign donor” Salomon Melgen are currently on trial for political corruption—the Senator for taking bribes and Melgren for paying them. Menendez argues that the “bribes” in exchange for pursuing legislation favorable to Melgren was “just ordinary politics—no worse than the actions of my many peers in Congress.”

As a case in point, the Senator pointed out that “former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev) was able to fatten his bank account through ‘sweetheart’ real estate deals with one of his donors. And he inserted language in the Affordable Care Act in exchange for money from the drug companies. He wasn’t prosecuted for any of this. Why am I being singled out?”

Prosecutor Peter Koski contended that Menendez “went outside the bounds of traditionally acceptable ‘pay-for-play’ bribery. Mr. Melgren doesn’t live in New Jersey. The Senator can’t pass off the favors he did as ‘constituent services.’ Former Senator Reid’s land deals were all conducted with a Nevada resident and constituent. And the payments he received from the drug companies were in the form of campaign donations. That Senator Reid retired and can now pocket these campaign donations is irrelevant.”

Kirk Ogrosky, the defense attorney for Melgen, called the distinctions between the actions of Senators Reid and Menendez “artificial. Mr. Melgren may not be a constituent of Senator Menendez in a geographic sense, but he is a constituent in a shared ethnicity. Both were part of the fellowship of Hispanic Americans. This trial is not only an attack on the two defendants, it is an attack on all Hispanics.”

Whether Menendez should resign from office if he is convicted posed a difficult dilemma for his Party peers. Senate Minority Leader Charles Schumer (D-NY) pondered the issue, observing that “on the one hand, a criminal conviction is not good for one’s resume as a member of government. Given the fact that so many have been able to skate past the rules that would typically land a violator behind bars, a conviction in his case would signal an unusual degree of incompetence. I mean, the Clintons raked in hundreds of millions of dollars using the leverage of public office. This was a much bigger heist than Senator Menendez’s petty larceny. Yet, neither of them are on trial nor likely to ever see the inside of a prison cell.”

“On the other hand, there is no constitutional bar to an elected representative also being a convicted felon,” Schumer continued. “Let’s not overlook the fact that the Senator does represent the State of New Jersey. The voters there have a right to elect whoever they wish. Who is to say that he isn’t the kind of person who best reflects the values and talents of that state’s inhabitants?”

Dems in 15 States Sue Over Trump DACA Action

Democrat Attorney-Generals in 15 states plus the District of Columbia have filed suit against President Trump for his executive action overturning former President Obama’s executive decree on Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA). Trump justified his countering executive decree by pointing out that Obama lacked the authority to unilaterally modify US immigration law. Trump’s decree goes into effect in six months—a time span giving Congress the opportunity to handle the issue in a legal and constitutional fashion.

Nonetheless, the suing AGs described Trump’s action as “illegal” and “unfair.” New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman cast Trump’s argument that only Congress can enact laws as “putting adherence to the law ahead of human decency. Whether President Obama had the legal right to enact DACA isn’t as important as whether it was the right thing to do. We’re hoping that the court will see past the legalities and confirm the fundamental justice of the DACA decree. These childhood immigrants are blameless. They have become accustomed to living in the United States. They shouldn’t be punished for the crimes committed by their parents.”

Schneiderman brushed aside the possibility that the suit may be premature since Congress may actually pass a law within the six-month grace period allowed by Trump’s executive action. “No person’s fate should be held hostage to a contingency that Congress will take timely measures to deal with an issue,” he asserted. “We have all seen how little Congress has accomplished over the past eight months. It would be foolish to count on this body to respond in an expeditious manner to the artificial deadline imposed by President Trump.”

For his part, Trump further muddled the issue by tweeting that he “may revisit the issue should Congress fail to act.” This is the same rationale used by Obama when he stepped outside the bounds of his authority to institute the DACA program.

In related news, Chicago Mayor Rahm Emmauel slammed Trump’s DACA move and declared “our City will always remain a safe haven for those pursued by immigration authorities. The same is not the case for Mr. Trump himself. He is barred from entering and police have orders to use whatever force is required to see that he stays away.”

Dem Drafting Legislation to Crack Down on College Freedom of Speech

Rep. Anthony Brown (D-Md) says he will introduce a bill that would require universities and colleges to define “acceptable speech” on campus. “On too many college campuses fresh-mouthed youths hide behind the First Amendment claiming that they have a right to air their unfiltered political views regardless of whether others might find them hurtful or outside the bounds of respectable opinion,” Brown said. “They openly flout the ‘free speech zone’ restrictions that school officials have imposed in an effort to protect students from hearing offensive remarks. We’ve got to put a muzzle on these free-speech abusers.”

Brown’s proposed legislation would set up a program to award grants to schools that “properly control what, when, and where students are allowed to voice their unsolicited opinions. No student should have to fear that a walk between classrooms would expose him or her to the rantings of right-wing anti-government ideologues. Universities that develop speech codes and procedures that will silence anti-progressive elements from infringing on the rights of others to not have to hear disturbing contradictions to prevailing mainstream views should be financially rewarded for their enterprise. My bill will do that.”

In related news, black caucus representatives at Harvard demanded that noted author and scholar Charles Murray be barred from speaking on campus—for public safety reasons. It’s not that the mild-manner Murray will rouse a rabble of right-wing goons to cause trouble. The fear is that “this racist apologist will instigate an oppressed minority to attack him. We haven’t read his books and we shouldn’t be forced to allow him to speak.”

More Comey Malpractice Unveiled

On top of last week’s revelation that former FBI Director James Comey drafted an exoneration memo for Hillary Clinton before more than a dozen witnesses had been interviewed, this week it was disclosed that the famous “30,000 missing emails” were in the possession of the National Security Agency (NSA). And, it turns out, Comey declined to accept the NSA’s offer to provide him with copies.

In defense of this refusal to receive evidence, Comey pointed out that “the decision not to prosecute Secretary Clinton was unanimous. As such, there was no reason to probe these emails. At best, we would have found that she was telling the truth that none of these emails dealt with government business. At worst, we would have found that she lied. This would have cast a serious pall of doubt over the reputations of those of us, including Attorney General Lynch and President Obama, who had already agreed that there would be no prosecution.”

“I was the ‘good soldier’ following the orders of my superiors,” Comey explained. “It is the Attorney General who determines which cases are worthy of prosecution. She, of course, must answer to the President. If he decides there is to be no prosecution then both she and I, as his subordinates, must obey. That I stepped up and took the heat for announcing there would be no prosecution was a heroic act of a loyal subordinate. I deserve praise, not persecution, as will become obvious when my book is published.”

Justice Dept Declines to Press Charges Against IRS Official

Assistant Attorney General Kevin Boyd announced that the Trump Administration will not be pursuing charges against former IRS executive Lois Lerner for discriminating against conservative organizations seeking tax-free status from the Agency.

While conceding that Lerner’s refusal to testify on the grounds it would be self-incriminating was, in effect a “smoking gun,” Boyd insisted that “the prosecution of a government functionary for carrying out the wishes of the president would be excessively punitive and set a dangerous precedent. A person entering the ranks of an administration shouldn’t have to be second-guessing every decision—is it right, is it wrong, is it legal or illegal. That would slow the gears by which the president’s will prevails in the making of policy.”

“Ideally, the chief executive is the one who should be held accountable,” Boyd argued. “Difficult as this might be given that the president can order enemies to be killed, nevertheless, it is a basic principle of our Constitution. The proper remedy would be impeachment. Since the person responsible for the IRS’ illegal acts is no longer in office the entire matter is now moot.”

Rep. Kevin Brady (R-Tex), chairman of the House Ways and Means Committee, called the decision not to pursue the case “terrible. It sends the message that the same legal, ethical, and Constitutional standards we all live by do not apply to Washington political appointees—who will now have the green light to target Americans for their political beliefs and mislead investigators without ever being held accountable for their lawlessness.

A Satirical Look at Recent News
John Semmens is a retired economist who has written a weekly political satire for The Arizona Conservative since 2005. He says working on his satires is one of the ways he tries to honor the liberties our Founding Fathers tried to protect.

Please do us a favor. If you use material created by The Arizona Conservative, give us credit and DO NOT change the context. Thank you.